Today we talk about happiness in the family.

«We often see that children have a responsibility from young age and are asked to contribute. They are raised to be aware of their responsibility to contribute to society and to take care of others.»

Which difference makes a difference in Danish families?
For Danish families it is common that both parents are working and very common that all children are in childcare. Often public childcare. It is also common to live together as a family, and have siblings and grandparents living further away, spread over the country. Raising children in Denmark is about making them independent and help them grow into responsible adults. We often see that children have a responsibility from young age and are asked to contribute. They are raised to be aware of their responsibility to contribute to society and to take care of others.

Is there any “formula” in the Danish collective unconscious for families to live in harmony?
Many families want to live in harmony. But in Denmark the divorce rate is also very high. So I also think that many Danes want to always be able to pursue what they find best. And sometimes that does not mean keeping the family together. Danes focus on their freedom as an important value as well.

«In Denmark we have a culture where children are taught to understand a message and to take responsibility, rather than being physically punished.»

In many European countries, shouting, spanking and punishment inflicted on children are still socially accepted and defended. What do you think about these practices?
In Denmark it is forbidden by law to hit or hurt children in any way. And in Denmark we have a culture where children are taught to understand a message and to take responsibility, rather than being physically punished.

How do you believe that can we educate for happiness?
We can be aware of our own happiness first. We are responsible for our own happiness – and we are responsible for the happiness of people around us. And then we can educate by informing people about what creates happiness. That means, for example, that social relations and a good health are more important than a raise in income. At the Institute we try to educate and inform people. And we hope to reach many people every year and to make them work on creating happiness as well.

«We are responsible for our own happiness – and we are responsible for the happiness of people around us.»

How can we free a mother from the burden of a family?
We find that mothers are often happy in their families, but we can also see that there is something called “parental gap”, where parents will experience a decrease in happiness, when they have children, but then an increase when they have grandchildren. We find that this is due to more worries arising when we have children. This can be prevented with good family policies, as in countries like Denmark, Sweden and the Netherlands. Here the gap is smaller because parents will not have to worry with schools or hospitals for their children. And there will be good childcare and many ways to be a family, which will make it easier to find the form that fits each individual family.

Kindness, trust, empathy, equal value… these are the key to a happy family?
Yes, we find that good and strong social ties are important. And the values you mention are positive to creating strong social ties. As well as freedom to make our own life choices.

What still needs to be done to have a world where families live in harmony, and where equal value and responsibility prevail?
We think that good family policies and a political awareness to take care of the needs of families and children are important to achieve this goal.

O conteúdo The secret of the happiest families on Earth aparece primeiro em Rita Aleluia.

I dream of a world of Peace. I dream of a world of Love. I dream to see our NLP community United, to see us respect each other and go forth in the same direction to create a more humane world, the kind of world we want to live in.

In Bali, this September it will born the 4th generation NLP. It is oriented on developing spiritual intelligence. Two Master Trainers from NLP University, Colette Normandeau and Humphrey Conceição, felt that the conditions to the world plunge into the 4th generation of NLP were created. They united synergies in this challenge they’ve embraced with total support and presence of many of the most prestigious co-authors and trainers of global NLP: Robert Dilts, Deborah Bacon Dilts, Judith DeLozier, Steven Gilligan…

4th generation NLP is oriented on developing spiritual intelligence, connection at a Source, Soul and Spirit level. We seek a deeper meaning within and beyond self and collaboration.

This is Colette Normandeau message about this unique program uniting passionate “NLPiers” from around the world :

« I dream of a world of Peace. I dream of a world of Love. I dream to see our NLP community United, to see us respect each other and go forth in the same direction to create a more humane world, the kind of world we want to live in.

I dream of dropping conflicts and views on our seeming differences, to find ourselves in our likeness and connectedness. I dream to see us evolve and co-create together what could not have existed, if it not for the union of our essences and uniqueness. We are richer and stronger together than against or alone.

You may think I’m a dreamer… I know I’m not the only one. Doesn’t everything start with a dream? Maybe it’s meant to be achieved in this life or the next. The importance is to visualize it, nourish it, cherish it and start to build this dream as of now, so that one day …one day it can be a reality.

I am very passionate about NLP. You probably are too. Since my first NLP training courses, I had the impression of finally finding a reference book for being, and a key to let surface what is most precious and sacred in me. And what to say to our magnificent toolbox for transformation? We have access to a universal treasure chest, garnished with ultra-effective and powerful tools and models from the 1st, 2nd and 3rd generation NLP. All so useful to make a difference in the lives of people and the world. Much Joy and Gratitude I have for this.

As coaches, consultants, trainers, school directors, we propagate our love for life, humanity and NLP and have maybe started to reflect what will be the next generation of NLP. Many have shared with me that they have been working at it for a certain time, each in their own corner. Last summer at NLPU in a discussion with Robert Dilts on 4th generation, the word ‘Source’ came about. The next level would be more spiritual and an exploration of ‘Source’.

A group of “NLPiers” from the NLPU community, believe it is NOW time to connect and co-create together this 4th generation…to define it, to share what already exists, to mutually enrich ourselves, to start modelling connection to Source and prepare what comes next… TOGETHER. It will also be an occasion to transmute original NLP history, the squabbles and conflicts of appropriation. Let’s walk the talk and live our values we teach: love, authenticity, openness, flexibility, fun, creativity, respect, integrity, congruence and humanity.

You are graciously invited to join us in Bali from September 7 to 17, 2017 for a unique program uniting passionate “NLPiers” from around the world.»

Colette and Humphrey share with us a little bit more about this step forward in NLP.

What was the core intention for creating the event in Bali?

We have so many people spread through the world who have accumulated a wealth of knowledge and experience with different environments and cultures. Their own NLP skills have helped them develop individual strengths, which we assess will be so much more powerful if put together in collaboration. Thus we will all gain when we surface and develop with the collective minds to:

• Develop the next generation of NLP together,
• Create new tools to be used in certifying schools, trainings and individual consultations,
• Uniting and strengthening the community, being as a community the change we want to see in the world,
• Growing individually and collectively,
• Enhancing our teachings through congruency ‘walking our talk’.

Oneness…finding common ground that place where we are one. Strengthening and sponsoring our commonality, thus, contributing to more love, peace and harmony.

What’s the essence of this encounter?

• Exploring and defining Source, modeling spiritual leaders in their ability to connect to Source.

What from your point of view, is the basis of the 4th generation of NLP?

• 1st generation NLP was based on changing and enhancing behaviors and cognitive mindset
• 2nd generation NLP contributes to changing beliefs and introduces work with the somatic mind
• 3rd generation NLP is more oriented in systemic, generative collaboration and development of field mind
• 4th generation NLP is oriented on developing spiritual intelligence, connection at a Source, Soul and Spirit level. We seek a deeper meaning within and beyond self and collaboration.

Finding ways to honor our essence, honor life, see through the eyes of the heart and soul the beauty of our human experience.

What is the difference that makes the difference, in our actual world?

• Higher Consciousness, Connection, Creativity,
• Nourishing Unity, awakening Humanity, spreading Harmony,
• Oneness…finding common ground that place where we are one. Strengthening and sponsoring our commonality, thus, contributing to more love, peace and harmony,
• Finding ways to honor our essence, honor life, see through the eyes of the heart and soul the beauty of our human experience.

Who can participate in the event?

• All trainers, master trainers, coaches, consultants, developers, NLP school directors, who are passionate about and sharing NLP, it’s evolution at a spiritual level and contribution to a world we all want to belong. Humanity needs leaders to help the world heal for Generations to come.

It is a blessing and an honor to be part of and to contribute to this creation. To keep on evolving in my essence and to participate in making the World a better place to be born in and to BE.

Keep in mind: 4th generation NLP. It is oriented on developing spiritual intelligence.

Registration: https://nlp4thgeneration.com/

O conteúdo 4th generation NLP is oriented on developing spiritual intelligence aparece primeiro em Rita Aleluia.

We met, in person, at the University of California Santa Cruz (UCSC), at the NLP University, where Judith was my trainer.

She’s punctual to all engagements and introduces herself to everyone, with two kisses.

The mother and grandmother that once was a ballerina, doesn’t practice traditional meditation. Judith, prefers to take daily walks with her dogs and says “one step I ‘m here, two steps I’m away and I come back next with another step to the now”.

Judith is not a vegetarian, she eats of everything, with moderation and drinks a lot of liquids during the day, especially water. About the metaphor that defines her, she has no doubts assuming: “it’s a spiral”

How do you feel when people say you are NLP’s mother?

Old… No! (laughs) It feels really good, you know. I feel I’ve been around for a long time. I wasn’t at the very beginning of NLP. I mean, there’s always a pre-history before any history.

I stepped on in that pathway in 1974. And there was myself, Leslie Cameron Bandler, and Mary Beth Mayers and other men and women, like John Grinder and Richard Bandler and, Robert Dilts wasn’t there yet, Steve Gilligan was. He was 19 years old. And then I met Robert within about one year and an half, he was also 19 years old. And so in away I kind of am a mom, grandma of NLP, I feel really blessed.

«Don’t teach children what to think, but how to think and if they learn how to think, then they will be able to learn anything.»

Is that true that you introduced ecology?

Introduced ecology? Well I don’t know that I introduced ecology. I certainly believe that positive intention when that sort of started to emerge. Emerged first at the six of every framing that John and I sort of developed at one point together. And then it became the idea of positive intention. Started to be, really, really more and more connected in NLP and in NLP processes and the future passing, but I don’t feel like I’m responsible for that. I feel like wisdom is a really important thing and some people have it more than others. I think that John and Richard where kind of, they were guys in their time, you know. It was the guruism of the 70’s and people were looking to gurus and I think it was very easy to be in that position and also the world was supporting them in being in that position my perspective was I don’t want to go there, because it’s long ways down. And I see it dissociating people from their communities And so if it’s that ecology, maybe so, but.

«Kids are very chinestesic, they don’t learn by listening but by doing. No kid would be left behind regarding the goals of the program if we had better strategies to deal with every representational system.»

Do you feel responsible, like a guru, of something, specifically NLP?

No, not necessarily. I mean I know the flags that I carried, one is about community in the field, that’s been part of my thing from the beginning. And the other thing is somatic syntax or the soma going the body as a full representational system, that it has memory, that it codes and decodes information and that people treated it more like it was a vessel that carried emotion. It’s always about the vessel that carried emotion. Emotions they move through us, yes, they’re very archetypal , they move through us they do it to wake us up, not to get stuck. But the body itself was not really being honored as a representational system, like the vision was, like the auditory digital was like the tonal. So that was definitely a flag. I think also in terms of making a social contribution and has been a very big flag that I carried, in working with a lot of non-profits and also creating a space who people working in non-profits can come and cry or heal themselves or be with people like them because they’re doing an extremely hard work for almost nothing or nothing. Quiet often. so I think it’s also been at least a flag.

«I would say the biggest thing is to leave a legacy. Spend some time thinking about what you want to leave behind when you´re gone and the quality of what you want to leave behind when you’re gone.»

How do you feel NLP in nowadays?

It’s been kind of amazing to see NLP over the years go through this 3 different descriptions to have been lucky enough to be part of all those descriptions and to see how they interface with each other to create a richer and richer sort of territory, or map or landscape of NLP, I love that. I love the fact that it has made so many applications, whether is leadership, or management, or the arts or health or education. I think that is really, really amazing and is kind of proof that we can do success factor modeling , that we can pass it on and it makes a difference because we’re humans and we have the same hard drive, hardware, different software downloaded but the same hardware. I love that and it’s amazing to look back and go wow, this little cowgirl from Oklahoma who grew up in a town of about 14000 people. Who would have guessed that I would find myself here having this conversation with you? That is kind of magical. So anything is possible. Don’t forget anything is possible.

How do you see NLP in education?

I think that NLP should be more in education. I see some place around where it is actually thought and used specifically in education. There are universities around the world that teaches it as a course. Mexico city is one of those and Shanghai also. It’s amazing to see how it’s becoming an entire system of therapy, for example in Austria It takes 4 years to become a therapist. And also in England, in a company called Believe where they fought really hard and did all the hard work in order to get it define as a therapeutic pathway for people, with supervision, that’s pretty amazing when you look at it. That’s a lot of good signals. I would like to see it more and more in education. It’s a little beat like don’t teach kids what to think, but how to think, and if they learn how to think they can learn anything. (Laughs)

And I think it also gives to people, little kids. Kids who are very chinestesic, all of a sudden are falling behind because they’re not on the path, they don’t see it yet, they hear it in a different way because they’re very chinestesic, and they learn by doing. No kid has to be left behind if you have, ultimately, better strategies for dealing with different systems. And I see that’s very beneficial.

I have a friend in Hong Kong who is a counselor in a very, very big school in Hong Kong. His an Australian guy. And they are designing an entire coaching package for all the teachers. But they’re going to teach it also to the 6th graders. So every year they’re going to teach this coaching process to the 6th graders so they can pass that through into the lower classes. I mean there some amazing things that can be done that will make a huge difference.

Would you like to send a message for mothers?

For moms. I mean I love your mom! And I love your mom who brought you into the world and love her mom who brought her into the world and all those hearbeats that go all the way back and then also love the big mom the Pachamama who feeds us all. Who houses us all. That would be my message love your mom and all those different meanings.

Is there something else you want to tell about NLP nowadays, mothers, education? Anything that seems important?

I think there are a lot of things that are important. I would say the biggest thing is to leave a legacy. Spend some time thinking about what you want to leave behind when you´re gone and the quality of what you want to leave behind when you’re gone. Think about what you’re teaching, what you’re passing on. Think about the legacy in that way. Think about the kind of model you are. Are you the kind of model you want to be? I think those are the kind of things to reflect on, not to judge. But to just go how can I be a better mom? How can I be a better environmentalist and take care of that mom? It’s not hard, you know?

What is your metaphor?

My metaphor is a tornado, but let me say in a different way, it’s a spiral. And sometimes it forms like a tornado and sometimes it’s also the structure of our DNA. So it occurs in nature, it occurs in us physically. You can see it in all over us. In things like fern, like the way they grow. So a spiral is a natural form in nature, but it can have a lot of power. If it’s in water or if it’s like a tornado or it can be a little dust devil that flies around. It’s natural.

O conteúdo To feel and to think, the educational tips of NLP’s mother aparece primeiro em Rita Aleluia.